Copyright The HUMOR Project, Inc 1995 -- All rights reserved
This first appeared in Laughing Matters Volume 10, Number 4

What follows is an excerpt from my keynote speech at the 10th annual international conference on THE POSITIVE POWER OF HUMOR & CREATIVITY in 1995:

Little things can make a big difference.

We're hoping that you're going to be inspired as a result of attending this conference. It's the little things, when you go back home, that can start to make the big difference. With this being our tenth annual conference, it's very appropriate and important for me personally to share a story with you. It's about a little thing that has made a big difference for me.

In 1977 my father had an aneurysm in his aorta. Not a laughing matter at all. He and my Mom flew from Maryland, where they were living, to Houston, Texas, where Michael DeBakey (world famous surgeon) was to perform the operation. I flew from Saratoga Springs to join Mom and Dad and lend whatever support I could, because our family is very close. Even though we had this renowned doc and his team doing it, there were clearly no guarantees. It literally was a matter of life or death.

If you wanted a before picture of stress, anxiety, and uptightness, we were it. Our family was frozen with fear and tension.... Then the proverbial funny thing happened on the way to the hospital. Mom and I were staying at a hotel that provided a shuttle van that ran back and forth to this huge hospital complex on a regular basis.

The man who drove the van was named Alvin. He was not related to the Chipmunks... but he was a magician, because in the short four minutes it took us to go from the hotel to the hospital, Alvin magically transformed uptight, stressed-out people like us into people who were able to laugh and chuckle and let go of some of that terrible tension.

Alvin performed his magic in a variety of ways. He may be personally responsible for the popularity of the smile button many years ago. With his own money, he purchased $65 of smile buttons every week to give to each of his passengers. So, literally and/or figuratively, he put a smile on a couple hundred thousand people. He did it by sharing jokes and shaggy dog stories. He did it by singing with children. He did it by just being playful and spontaneous in the moment.

One day, a woman in her 80's hobbled toward the van to go visit her husband in the hospital. As Alvin helped her up into the van so caringly, with a twinkle in his voice and eye he said, "After you see your husband, let's you and me go out dancing." It wasn't a come-on; it was a gentle way of teasing and tweaking and changing the mindset. She loved it... and laughed heartily!

It was a wonderful contagion that Alvin set in motion, because when we saw Dad, instead of passing on our stress (which was still there), we were able to convey to him hope, lightness, and some of Alvin's spirit. A silly example: one day we were walking down the hospital corridor, and up ahead there was a woman in one of those flowing hospital gowns. With tongue in cheek, I said to Mom and Dad, "If her name was Sara and she was from our town, we would call her "Sara-toga". Oh, well, when you're desperate.... Even if it brought out a groan and then a chuckle, it helped us break the back of the tension.

Thankfully, Dad recovered from that surgery, and we recovered from it as well. About two weeks after I returned from Houston, I got to thinking about this stranger, Alvin, who quickly became "family" to us. In retrospect, I certainly appreciated the gift of humor he gave us. I got to wondering: Do we have to wait for the Alvins of the world to come into our lives by chance at just the right moment? Since humor has such good and powerful effects and side-effects, couldn't we... and shouldn't we be more intentional about making humor happen instead of leaving it to chance?

That question is what motivated me to start The HUMOR Project in 1977, which was two years before Norman Cousins' best-selling book accelerated interest in the field. My goal in starting The HUMOR Project was not to analyze humor to death... but rather to answer my own curiosity about whether there are practical ways of bringing humor to life. And Alvin was clearly the inspiration for this question and quest.

Ever since then, I've tried to thank Alvin, this stranger who crossed our paths and entered our lives fleetingly and then was gone. For many years I've tried to find him to no avail. In 1985, I was asked to do a presentation on humor-and-healing for medical social workers at the same hospital where Dad had his operation. In going down there, I tried to reach Alvin to thank him for making a difference in my life, but had no luck. I wrote to the hotel at which he had been employed. The hotel had changed hands; it had been bought out by another hotel. The personnel department couldn't get me to Alvin.

I tried to find him through the media. In thousands of interviews I've done with newspapers, magazines, TV and radio shows, I've shared the Alvin story in hopes of finding him. But this "you've- made-a-difference" dragnet brought nothing.

With our tenth international conference coming up this year, I got to thinking I should rededicate myself to find Alvin to be able to thank him. As Bernie Siegel says, "Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous": One day, somebody called our office to order some books through our HUMOResources bookstore. Evidently, this person needed some humor books because she was facing a medical crisis herself. She said that they had been in Texas and had experienced a van driver who was of such cheerful spirit.

Ultimately, through this serendipitous conversation, I was able to get the last name of this van driver: Herndon. A week later I bought a computer CD-ROM that has phone numbers for 80 million residences in the United States. I looked up and listed all the Alvin Herndons in the United States.

I made a "cold call" to the first one on the list. How do you not come across as a sales person at night calling someone at home? I started with, "This is a strange request... I'm looking for somebody who made a big difference in my life 18 years ago. He drove a van and he was from Texas." I went on and told the story, and I said, "Is that you?"

And it was! It was the first Alvin Herndon I called. It was Alvin. I had made contact with Alvin.

I knew it was him because he told me in our phone conversation that he had come in second place two years in a row in the national Bellman of the Year contest. I had remembered back in 1977 that Alvin had told us about that. A thousand people are nominated each year; he was the first person in history to come in second two years in a row.

On the phone I was finally able to thank him personally, to let him know what a difference he made. But that wasn't enough; I wanted to see the man.

So last week I flew to Houston, and I met with Alvin again and his wonderful wife, Dawn. Even that wasn't enough for me. As a way of really saying "thank you," Margie and I have flown Alvin and Dawn here to the conference to be with us today, because we would like to give to Alvin the award for Humor and Al-truism. Would you please join me in welcoming Alvin Herndon.... At this point, 1000 people rose spontaneously and gave Al a thunderous, prolonged standing ovation. Speechless for minutes, and with tears streaming down his eyes (and all of our eyes), Alvin finally had a chance to experience all of our gratitude. Little things can add up to make a big difference. Humor can make a big difference. Alvin has made a big difference.

In past issues, I have had the good fortune to interview people well- known in the field of humor or comedy-- people like Jay Leno, Steve Allen, Charles M. Schulz, Lynn Johnston, Cathy Guisewite, Sid Caesar, Victor Borge, and many others. But the greatest thrill I've had was making contact with the person who is featured in this issue of LAUGHING MATTERS.

For more insight into this Al-truistic good samaritan, here are some excerpts from an interview I did with Alvin when I had a chance to rendezvous with him after 18 years:

Joel Goodman: Well, here is, in person, live, the man I have been talking about for 18 years to over 700,000 people throughout the world. I was wondering, Alvin, if you could just walk down memory lane a little bit. You had such a wonderful gift with all of us passengers in the van to help lighten our load. In looking back, was this something you were doing intentionally?

Alvin Herndon: It came naturally to me because I was from a family of twelve kids, and we always had a ball. We kidded each other a lot. We never did have a lot of fussing and fighting; we all got along. I was raised in a loving family and I always liked people. Anytime I can help somebody, I do it. When you see somebody sick like all those people at the hospital, and all the visitors in stress, you want to help them. Somebody's got to do it, and I was there, so I did it... the best I could. Joel: Look at the big impact you've had! Were there any particular tricks of the trade that you used with passengers that helped them lighten up in the midst of the stress and medical crises they were facing?

Alvin: Sure! I would learn the people first. Say a man and his wife would get on the bus and I would say to her, "Ma'am, this is not the man you were with yesterday!" I wouldn't say that unless I knew them after they had been there two or three days.

Joel: You were with many people for a lot longer than two or three days. In many cases, you became like extended family for folks facing medical challenges.

Alvin: We had a 17 year old girl named Libby who came to our hotel from Georgia, and she had leukemia. On the first several trips, her mother came with her. Then her mother did not come with her, her little 14 year old sister came with her. One day when it was about time for me to get off from work, I got a call from Libby from M. D. Anderson Hospital. She said, "Al, my cousin was supposed to pick me up when we got through our treatment today, and take us home with him, but Al, we only have $10 between us." I said, "Libby, you stay right where you are. I'll come and get you and I'll take you home with me", and I did that. She and her sister stayed with my wife and me ten days. She would go to work with me every morning to get her treatment and then she would go back home with me that evening and they would stay all night with us. While they were staying with us we would take them with us on the weekend to the flea market and different places. We took them out to eat, to relax them.

Now that was the good part about it, but it was about a week or two later, she passed away. Now that was one of the hard times, but just keeping those girls ten days in our home, it just made us feel so good. I'm sure everybody can understand that. You are doing good for somebody.

Then there was a little boy about six or seven years old, and he had leukemia. I carried him back and forth to the hospital about a year-and-a-half, and he would always want to sit up front with me, and we would joke, and we just became good friends, you know, and just, well, going with me for a year and a half, you know, you just learn to love this little boy, and then, like three days later, he passed away, and that just broke my heart.

And then I had another little boy from Mexico City, and we became pretty good friends. I hauled him probably about the same length of time-- about a year-and-a-half. One day, me and Helen (she ran the little coffee shop in the hotel) said we were going to make up a little gift box for this little Mexican boy and we put some toys, candy, and gifts, and it wasn't but about 3 or 4 days, and this little boy passed away. Now that really hurt, but it seems like just something told us to give this little boy this gift box.

Joel: You have certainly have given so many gifts to so many people. Obviously the gift of your caring is so important... and your gift of laughter in helping people to lighten their loads was so important to our family. I know that there are a lot of people out there who thank you. In fact, maybe you can tell a little bit of the story of how you were nominated for Bellman of the Year two years in a row, and what happened with all that.

Alvin: Well, it was 1976, our General Manager was Mr. Boudreaux, and he had gotten all these letters from all of the people that I had taken to the hospital and the clinic. And for that reason he nominated me for Bellman of the Year in a national contest sponsored by the Hotel/Motel Association. So he made up an album of all these letters and he sent pictures when I was helping people get on the bus, and all that, and I guess that there were so many letters that he thought I could win it! And, it came out that it was bellmen from all over the world and it was about 1000 participants, and I came in second! I've just been proud of that. You don't have to let it go to your head, but you know you have done something for somebody.

Joel: The hotel that you worked at really served the medical complex, and the people who were your passengers were really under a great deal of stress.

Alvin: That's right, most everyone of them. I was supposed to go to work from 7 until 3, but I knew how many people went over early in the morning, so I made sure that I was there at 6:30 to start loading them up. I didn't have to be, I didn't have to start until 7, but they would be standing out there on the sidewalk, ready to go, so I'd get a load of people, take 'em over, come right back, get another load, take 'em over, and it just went like that, for eight hours, just running. That's the reason I'm so skinny, you know!! I run all my fat off!

This lady came there and her husband was in the hospital. She had a little boy who was about five or six, and he was kind of wild just running up and down the halls and everything. It was hard for her to control him. She was stressed out! One weekend, I saw how he was and I said, "Why don't you let me take this little boy home with me this weekend, and you can relax the whole weekend?" I took him home, took him to the flea market and we played ball together, and she had the whole weekend in her room, visiting too, by herself, and she didn't have to bother with her little boy, and I'm just sure she appreciated that.

Joel: That's just going over and above the call of duty, for sure. Southwest Airlines, which is located here in Texas, certainly has been so successful partly because of delivering positively outrageous service. They go the extra mile. In your case, you go the extra smile! You helped countless people by being supportive and caring for them. It is such a wonderful blessing and a gift that you've given to so many people. I'm interested where you got this-- you talked about it coming from your family with twelve kids. Were there things that you remember from your mom and dad that encouraged your sense of humor and your sense of caring at the same time?

Alvin: It was by their example, because my daddy had a real good sense of humor-- he was a real joker. Yeah, I was

Joel: If you were to give advice to folks who take themselves too seriously sometimes, what would you say?

Alvin: Well, there's a lot of good people, and there's a lot of kind of nasty people. I've always said that rudeness is a little person's imitation of power, and I've tried not to be rude to people. If you're not rude to them, you gotta be something else to them, and it's got to be good! I just don't meet a stranger. I just think that if you'll just be friendly, no matter what you think of somebody, be friendly anyway, and maybe that will persuade them in the long run to be friendly.

Joel: You've had a lot of experience with a lot of people. Over the 35 years, two or three million people have crossed your path.

Alvin: I had one lady one time who rode the bus who was president of a women's college, but I didn't find this out until later. She'd get on my bus, she wouldn't smile, she would hardly speak to you. I carried her back and forth two or three days and one day I told her, "Ma'am, if you're going to ride my bus, you're going to have to smile!" And from then on she talked to me and she smiled with me and she smiled with everybody else and she talked with everybody else.

Joel: That reminds me of something that Jack Canfield taught me in 1970 when he and I were graduate students together. Jack talked about the idea of helping to create people who are inverse paranoids. Now I think humor is a great way of doing that by bringing out a smile on somebody's face. It's a great way of creating inverse paranoids-- people who think the world is out to do them good. This goes against what a lot of people think, the way they're looking over their shoulders and covering their tails.

I think humor is a wonderful way of helping people to see the part of life that's half full instead half empty, even if you are in a medical crisis or having a serious job of being a president somewhere. I really saw you as personifying and putting into practice this idea of helping to create people who are inverse paranoids, even when they were in the middle of a lot of pain and suffering and challenge. In creating inverse paranoids, there are a number of messages that you have given people over the years, literally and figuratively. Can you tell us a little bit about the buttons that you used to wear or give away to your passengers?

Alvin: Well to start with, I gave away about 200,000 smile buttons. When I started giving out these buttons to my customers, I would buy these buttons myself in 1000 box lots. Then the manager of the hotel found out I was giving out these buttons, and he started buying the buttons so I could hand them out.

Joel: You're probably personally responsible for the popularity of those smile buttons. What other buttons do you have?

Alvin: One day say I would wear a button that said "Calm Down," another day I would wear a button that said "Stay Calm," another day I would wear a button that had a key on it and it would say "Unwind".

Joel: You helped passengers to unwind by being playful, childlike, and by even swapping some jokes.

Alvin: The pastor of a church was having a service one Sunday, and when the service was over he stood on the steps, shaking hands with everybody... "Goodbye, have a nice day." And this old man came up to him and said, "Preacher, that was a damn good sermon you preached this morning." Preacher said, "Man, don't say that word, that's not a good word to say at the church, you know." He said, "But Preacher, that was a damn good sermon you preached this morning." "Don't say that, that's not a good word to say at church." He said, "But Preacher, I put a $100 bill in your collection plate." The Preacher said, "The hell you did."

Joel: You have filled a lot of emotional collection plates with your good deeds. If we were to make some Al Herndon clones, what advice would you give to other folks who were facing crises or medical emergencies in their lives?

Alvin: I'm not a professional speaker, but just take things as they come and do the best you can, and I say pray about things and don't look back, look ahead. Say everything's going to be alright. I can tell you if I had somebody in the hospital and they were having a heart operation or cancer, I would advise people that when they visit their folks in the hospital, to walk in with a smile on your face, no matter how bad they are, walk in with a smile on your face, because if they see a frown on your face, they're going to think something is wrong. So I say smile when you can.

Joel: Well you've helped over 700,000 who have been in my programs alone and then millions of others who are reached or touched or tickled by the publications we have or by the media exposure. I'm glad that people will finally, after hearing about you for so many years, have a chance to meet you in person and to see that you are very real, and very warm, and very alive, and very caring. I'm delighted that you are going to have a chance to rendezvous with us in Saratoga... and with the readers of LAUGHING MATTERS magazine!

Alvin Herndon and his wife, Dawn-- two kindred spirits Other people loved Alvin, too. He has touched hundreds of thousands of lives. Hundreds of people sent unsolicited letters to the hotel manager praising Alvin. Here is just an inspiring sampling:

"I have just returned home after a lengthy stay at your hotel while a patient at M.D. Anderson Hospital. What I'm really writing you about is the driver of the shuttle bus whose name is Al. He is such an outstanding person and so perfect for his job that I wanted to let you know. He's always in a happy mood, telling jokes, being so helpful to everyone getting on or off the bus, and no one is a stranger to him. I'm sure he brighten the day for everyone he comes in contact with."

"Also of great importance, his wonderful sense of humor. He has an encouraging word for each and every one of his riders. They all are patients with their kinfolks or friends, some are alone, and they are on their way to the various hospitals and clinics in the medical complex. Their hearts are heavy with their problems, but their burdens feel a little lighter after Al talks to them. He lifts their spirits and sends them off with a feeling of hope."

"I believe that Al Herndon helps more people that ride his bus to the Medical Center with his big smile, kindness and his kidding young and old alike. One morning, a little lady I'd seen many times, always alone, sat behind Al. He looked up in the mirror and said, 'Doesn't she have the sweetest face!' A tiny smile touched the mouth. I'm sure Al made her feel like someone cares. It's his sincere love for people that makes him enjoyed by so many."

"He is very important in keeping up the humor and will to get well of all the sick people staying here in the hotel. With his big friendly smile he lets us know we are not alone here. What calls our attention most is that Al is always in good humor, it doesn't matter if it's early in the morning or late in the afternoon, each time the van picks us up, Al is in excellent humor, and always ready to tell his jokes."

"When you get on that bus, Al is right there giving you a hand. He keeps things going, everybody talking and laughing until you forget for a while that you are sick and there for a cure. I know because I was a patient myself with cancer in the lymph glands."

"Al Herndon with his congenial manner, his humor, and his promptness have meant so much to all of us that ride his bus. I have seen people laugh who really thought they could not."

"My mother has been a guest at your hotel for the past six weeks while a patient at M.D. Anderson Hospital. Al Herndon has made her stay a pleasure. His courtesy, consideration, ready smile, and quick wit has started and ended each day with a smile for her. Wouldn't the world be a nicer place to be with more Al's!"

"Al cheers more people in one day than anyone else in Houston. He is the best in his work and genuinely happy in what he is doing."

"From every corner of the earth they come; filled with fear and anxiety; young and old; disfigured faces; some lame. One can read the expression of hope, confusion, despair and determination upon their faces as they patiently wait for the shuttle bus. The heartbeat of this service is Al-- the ambassador of good will. Like magic, he has all these people laughing out loud. Just imagine seeing all those expressions change in a moment."

"I arrived in Houston to begin a three month series of Cobalt treatment for cancer. I stayed at your hotel because of a friend who told me about Al. My wife and I rode with Al at least twice every day for 98 days. As you can imagine I was suffering both physically and mentally. Al's good humor, happy smile, and jokes did more to make this period tolerable for my wife and me than any other thing in all of Houston."

"If everyone could light just one little candle, what a bright world it would be. Well, Al does more than his share. He is sometimes the only bright spot in a dark, lonely, sick day. When a person is away from home, alone, sick, and afraid-- Al is good medicine."

"Al's really like family away from home. To know him is to love him... and everyone does."

"Your bellman Al has given hope and happiness to more people than anyone person in these United States. He is the most warm and unselfish person I have ever met."

"I am sure that the high point of many of the patients' days is meeting Al as he loads his little bus and carries them to the hospital. He works hard at always being cheerful. He greets every person and tries to give them a real lift of spirit in some way before they embark. His P.M.A. (Positive Mental Attitude) is reflected in the faces of those with whom he has contacted. Al goes the second mile in helping people in so many ways. What a beautiful world this would be if everyone worked at bringing a little sunshine into the lives of all they meet each day as does Al Herndon."

"The Medical Center in Houston provides the most sophisticated medical care in the world. With his warmth, courtesy, kindness, and good humor, Al Herndon contributes a badly needed touch of humanness in a highly depersonalized situation." (patient from Quito, Ecuador)

"Those who ride the buses to and from the medical center are ever in need of a spirit lifter which is Al Herndon personified. He has just the right congenial word, song or repartee for each passenger to take his or her mind off any problems, at least momentarily, and imprint the idea that the struggle for recovery is worth it."

Al Herndon is one of those people who doesn't seem to need a reason for caring-- he just does. He is a gentle, humble, unassuming man with a big heart. He has a knack for helping people smile when there is little to smile about. His sense of caring and sense of humor are what inspired the creation of The HUMOR Project.

To Alvin, I will be forever grateful.

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